Let me elaborate. Most of the time kayaking is done in places that are, to all extents and purposes, in the middle of nowhere. As a result of this whenever you go kayaking it's fairly likely that you'll bump into people who will probably understand at least part of why we enjoy it. After all, they're outdoorsie too.
Yesterday evening, standing on top of the bridge that gives it's name to Bridge of Allan, things were slightly different from the norm. After paddling a tiny section of the river Allan through the centre of Dunblane we skipped a section to then paddle from Bridge of Allan to where it joins the River Forth. Kitted out in my wetsuit trousers, spray deck, dry cag, buoyancy aid and helmet I was waiting on my mate Andy joining me whilst having a little peek at the water to plan my route.
As I'm peering down at the river this man in wellies sidles up to me, trying to catch my attention. It is one of the most bizarre exchanges I believe I've ever had:
"Hi there" I say cheerily.
"Do you know what the flow rate is in the Allan today?" he immediately asks me. What I'm thinking is that I don't have a f***ing clue, and come to think of it nor am I particularly bothered. I politely keep that in my head (where it belongs) and say "Erm... no."
Coupled with a look of sheer incredulity, he replies "you mean you DON'T know the flow rate here???"
I'm about to start explaining about how we judge if rivers are navigable by looking at them but that also sites like www.wheresthewater.com can be a godsend when he immediately asks "Do you know what the flow rate is just up the road at the river Forth?"
"Erm..."
"It's forty eight cubic metres per second" (don't hold me to the accuracy of this statistic, he may have said something that was different by a factor of 10 or even 1,000).
What follows is an awkward silence where he looks at me expectantly, as if I should now acknowledge what an amazing fact that is and how clever he is. I don't. Right on cue Andy turns up, meaning I need to jump back in my car and follow him. I make my excuses.
After almost getting run over by Andy he disappears into a pub. I strongly suspect he was disappearing back into the pub. Nonetheless, what a bizarre exchange.
I'm always happy to chat to someone I haven't met before, but next time if you're as weird as that can you settle for giving me a funny look from the other side of the road? Please?
